The Second Arrow of Suffering
Don’t suffer Twice
The parable of the second arrow is a well-known Buddhist story about dealing with suffering more skilfully. It is said the Buddha once asked a student,
‘If a person is struck by an arrow, is it painful? If the person is struck by a second arrow, is it even more painful?’
The Buddha then went on to explain,
‘In life, we can’t always control the first arrow. However, the second arrow is our reaction to the first. This second arrow is optional.’
We all often had those bad days, where we are upset or disappointed over certain events. Perhaps it is a breakup. Or maybe you messed up your examinations. We desperately wished that we can turn time back and turn things around.
If only
If only life unfolds in the way we want it to.
The notion that things can be different, things being right is tempting and desired by us. And this reaction to a bad event creates a second suffering, a second arrow. You are already wounded by the event. The break-up happened. You lost your job. This is the first arrow, and that’s the pain.